First let me start by saying that anti-depressants have their place. I believe they are a modern miracle and when people with chemical imbalances can experience mood stability, the improved quality of life is immeasurable.

However, if you are someone who has been blocked from emotional expression your entire life, and you are holding on to the pain associated with chronic unmet emotional needs, what is required is to start to attune to your painful emotions, self-validate these emotions, process the past origins, express the emotions and needs in your relationships, and get healing that way.

There is so much freedom and expansion that comes with speaking the truth in your heart—it is so energising and mood-enhancing that it literally creates new neural pathways that generate oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine and all the feel-good chemicals that our bodies are naturally capable of producing.

Anti-depressants without emotional expression and self-validation are just a band-aid. Do the deep healing work that is required for you to become fully connected to your heart, validating your own emotional experience and speaking your heart’s TRUTH.

Tips to activate more emotional expression:

1. Start by being curious about all of your emotions. Ask yourself: “What makes me mad? What makes me sad? What makes me anxious? What makes me excited? What makes me ecstatic?”

2. Start taking your emotions at face value. That means not questioning them, not overly analysing whether they are “correct” or not, and not wondering how other people might feel if they were in this situation. Just trust that whatever you are feeling, there is some truth to it that deserves your attention.

3. Start to adopt the mindset that all healthy relationships involve emotional expression. If we were not free to say how we feel in our relationships, then how could we possibly learn about one another as we go along the journey of relationship? We want to create relationships where emotional expression does not mean the other person is wrong or in trouble, it just means that something is worthy of processing together.

Emotional expression is one of four components of the Connection code that we activate in The Wellbeing Codes. Activating the connection code results in better connection to our hearts and ultimately better relationships with an intimate partner.

Article written by Dr Tracy Hunter

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